a small list of greatest fears

1. i will love you and you will not love me in return.

2. you will love me and i will not love you in return.

3. we will break each other’s hearts in two.

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muse III

so far now from the touch of your skin,

i still find myself desperate

to admire my reflection in

your twisted artist’s mirror.

 

that’s all this ever was, really.

season 2, ep. 13

he hands her the ring and it’s

different than i remember from

when i watched it the first time,

staying up too late longing for

the feeling of

warm fingertips and cold metal

in the palm of my own hand

 

i forgot that the ring was something final

that his hands were cold

that the world was ending

 

you hand her the ring and it’s

different than i imagined from

when we talked about it for the first time,

staying up too late longing for

the feeling of

warm fingertips and cold metal:

                            my palms remain empty.

                            my world is not ending.

 

time moves in

strange, uncomfortable waves

 

the light on the ocean is blinding

 

i lift up a hand to shield myself from the rays.

i take up my armor.

i remind myself:

this is how it has to be.